I am so bitterly disappointed.
I have always dreamed of the moment when I could breathe, and take the time to sort out all the thoughts and ideas accumulated during a 20 year long career to write a doctoral thesis. Especially after the last two years where I feel as though I was continually faced with enormous political conundrums which I was not equipped to face except as part of a team. I was part of a team, but almost none of them had any experience in my field, so I spent too much time educating them.
So now, I was finally going to have the breathing space to think through and find solutions and evidence.
Instead I am still being forced to write things I have not had the time to reason through. Distressed may be a good word for it actually. Because at this point, if it were feasible, I would love to give up. And that just makes me sad. I am living my dream and I am miserable.
So, as I said. The joke's on me.
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